Doldrums? Duldrums?, Dull Drums? Drums can be tuned. Tune it to the Left or Tune it to the Right.

I really DO have so much to be thankful for in my life. I am thankful. It’s lengthy, but you’ll hear/see/know my heart through it all.

1. I have been praying for us to be out of debt for quite some time and we are working diligently towards that goal. Just recently, someone sent us a sizable financial gift that will help us out tremendously.

2. For over 3 years, I have wanted to convert my living room color scheme into dark brown and lime green. I have wanted a dark brown leather love seat, ottoman and chairs to match; it's on my prayer/want list. Two days ago, I kid you not; a friend was in my house, saw my furniture and said, "This is the exact color and style of furniture that would look absolutely fantastic in my house! I said to my friend, well, it's yours, but I am looking for dark brown leather furniture to replace it. I prayed out loud and told Father I needed furniture to replace the ones I was giving this friend.

I sent out a mass message to friends (all 13 of them, lol) in my area telling them my desire to bless my friends and need of a replacement couch/love seat/chairs and asked them to pray for me. I told my sister this morning that I would like to give my couch set away today but really do need/want my living room to have furniture as well.

Father is so amazing! Within 24 hours of sharing with my friend who wanted our furniture, I received an email stating someone had a brown leather love seat and chair they would love to give me with pictures attached. I immediately sent an email to my friend whom I am giving our furniture set to and said, "When would you like to pick up your furniture..." and told them what happened. The friend who is letting me look at their brown leather furniture said I didn't have to take it if it's not quite what I want." I am so stoked! The joy that is busting out of me is unreal concerning these two magnificently wonderful miracles. Father loves me so much and is doing everything to work His will in my life and His other kids!

3. Thanksgiving is my most favorite of all holidays (along with my birthday), hands down.

Why:

shopping for dinner

planning out the meal

inviting friends, friends of friends, people I don't know for the meal

the warmth in the home

the fragrances

all the most glorious memories I have from previous Thanksgivings

making the dishes

glimpses of Keven’s mom and dad (dad passed away 4 years ago) coming to my mind

            as we prepare food

making sugar cookies for my boys and Aaron

making the darkest chocolate pie Keven loves

making the turkey, Lois peeling the potatoes and visiting with me, making the dressing, potatoes, gravy, pineapple bread, corn pudding, sweet potatoes (being sure to darken the edges for George because he loved it that way)

all the pleasant conversations all throughout the day

seeing family and loved ones

and so much more....

This year there is no shopping, no fragrances, no friends coming over, no left overs, no hospitality needed on grand, grander, grandiose scales, no family to visit with in my home (outside of Keven)...yes, this is my reality for this year...it may seem like I am sad and you know what, knowing some of the responses I will receive from my 'encouraging'-keep-on-the-sunny-side-of-life-be-joyful-in-all-things kind of friends, it is sort of sad. Yet, IT IS ALSO a year for something new.

You see, Keven asked if we could do something different this year. Everything within me screamed and cried out, not to him, "You KNOW this is my favorite holiday! You KNOW I love to bake, cook, have fragrances wafting throughout our home, organize and time when the foods need to go in and out of the oven, shed a tear for lost ones, and for family members I won't get to see, but remember with great thanks for them in my life! You KNOW I LOVE EVERY DETAIL ABOUT THANKSGIVING and YOU WANT ME TO GIVE THAT ALL UP because YOU WANT TO DO SOMETHING DIFFERENT?"

For weeks I had been asking Keven what we were doing for Thanksgiving because I was already gathering a list of people to invite (ok there may have only been 3-4 on the list and they may have already had plans, but I had a LIST) and it didn't matter to me if anyone came. Having Thanksgiving Dinner at my home or with others in their home brings sweet love, joy and comfort to my life.

Thanksgiving Day (though I am thankful everyday) is my day to offer Thanks to Father by serving, giving, creating, blessing, preparing, sharing the foods and memories I hold dear with others and make new memories for the new year.

Now before anyone wants to beat Keven up for taking such a special holiday away from me or want to beat me up for being ‘selfish’. Here’s what I have chosen to do:

When Keven explained to me that he wanted to do something different this year for the holiday. I thought, “uggh, really, why?” I SAID, “Ok, if that is what you want to do, ok.” Now I have had a week to prepare myself that things are going to be different today and tomorrow. (Wednesday before Thanksgiving and Thanksgiving) I also have been speaking to myself aloud and in my mind, “You are deferring to the wants and needs of Keven. You are giving and showing love. Chin up Wendi, you can do this. You can give to Keven, bless the socks off him AND make new memories.”

Again, I do so love the old memories and memories we would have had this year if we had had Thanksgiving in our home or with others. I am not trying to recreate the past, but I like the old memories. I love to serve…I love to serve and bless Keven as well. I like change too.

That my dear ones, is what I am doing this year. I am deferring and preferring Keven’s desire or want to have a change in our Thanksgiving THIS YEAR. I am choosing to keep a healthy attitude and happy facial expressions even though there is some sadness in my heart.

I am choosing joy, mind you, but that doesn’t mean I cannot feel sadness at the same time and shed an occasional tear. I miss my children, my parents, Keven’s dad, Keven’s mom, Keven’s family, my sisters, and my many, many friends who live all over the world. I miss you all terribly, but not so terribly that I am crippled without you, for that would be unhealthy and unwise. I do miss you though. I am thankful for all the sweet memories. You have invested into who and what I am and I am a product of who you are.

Thank you for all the memories and a very happy Thanksgiving to you, whether you get to do what you want OR YOU CHOOSE to be unselfish and DEFER TO BLESS AND LOVE SOMEONE ELSE AND DO SOMETHING FOR THEM.

If the heartbeat in a certain area of your life seems a bit inactive, dull, stagnate or has lost its luster try tuning your drum (the things you are beating, desiring, wanting, needing). A simple turn to the left or right can change the pitch to any drum. If I had chosen to concentrate only on what I liked, wanted and needed for Thanksgiving my drum would sound flat. It would cause other areas of my life to sound flat or be flat.